Cringey Culinary Creations: 40+ Food Choices That Will Make Anyone’s Stomach TurnBy Bruna L
Ever since the year we all had to stay home, we have had a multitude of crazy recipes appearing all around. A couple of them look fantastic, but most of them look like something your dog would do after eating too fast. Those, we call culinary crimes.
The worst part is, sometimes it’s not even the ordinary people at home committing those crimes, but food companies themselves! From weird-flavored syrups and milk to radioactive-looking pies and cakes, we, unfortunately, have seen it all!
If you want to take a peek at all these food abominations, this is the article for you! Afterward, we’re sure you’ll agree that there should be some sort of punishment for all those involved in making these products. Here are 45 times people committed the most heinous food crimes. Enjoy!
Caesar salad is one of the most traditional salads in the world. That’s why it’s so hard to mess it up. No matter what you do, you can always try to fix it, call it a local variation of the recipe, and that’s it!
Some things are unforgivable, though, especially if you’ve paid $15 for them! Don’t get us wrong, with the DIY fad going on these days, we’re not really surprised about this. However, the customer should have been informed that their salad would come straight from IKEA and would need to be ‘assembled’!
When some people hear the word “salad,” they picture lettuce, tomatoes, salad dressing, and croutons. Something simple, tasty, and quite nutritious. We’re pretty sure that’s precisely what comes to everyone’s mind. Everyone – except for the mother of the person below!
Apparently, her salads consist of mandarins, pineapples, carrots, cottage cheese, and many, many more horrifying things, like mayo and jello, for example! Looking at these pictures, we wonder if what our pets do when they eat too fast is nothing but “salad,” too!
If you’re unfamiliar with it, 7-up is just another non-caffeinated lemon-flavored soda out there. And like with any other carbonated drink out there, there’s a legion of people that simply loves it! Maybe that’s why cakes made with 7-up are so popular!
At first, you may be scared if you stumble upon this cake at your local grocery store, but according to many commenters online, this cake is actually pretty good, especially if homemade! It is fluffy, moist, and has a delicious lemony zing to it. Who would have thought?
Deep fried watermelon
For some reason, parts of the United States are simply obsessed with deep frying anything they can put their hands on. Candy bars, pickles, butter, even water, nothing can escape the bubbly oil ending! So, why would it be any different with fruits?
Someone went and made deep-fried watermelon because why not, right? We don’t know about you, but that sounds absolutely vile. Maybe it is the thought of watermelon-flavored grease or just how watery it looks! Either way, it’s a “no” from us!
Blueberry beef patty
Grocery stores are renowned for going out of their way to ensure every single product is sold by the end of the day. And if they fail, they’ll simply try again the next day! They’ll lower their prices, offer exciting sales, and try new marketing strategies; they’re relentless!
That said, we would have never expected to see actual moldy meat being sold. That’s just disgusting if you ask us! What do you mean this isn’t mold? Maple blueberry beef patties? What does that even mean? Oh, well. Buy at your own risk!
Avocado toast crunch
As we all know, avocados are super duper popular right now. Avocado toast and guacamole are all the rage everywhere – to the point that avocado prices have gone through the roof! Now that’s what we call popularity, isn’t it? Unbearable prices!
Anyway, if you are a fan of this delicious greenness, then you’ll probably love the breakfast cereal above! You didn’t read it wrong; it is avocado toast crunch, made with real avocados! We can’t even guess what that tastes like!
Limited edition milky ‘goodness‘
If you think about it, it’s pretty common for some people to become lactose intolerant when they hit adulthood. There’s a scientific explanation for that, of course, but you need to know that your body, too, can reject milk at any moment in your life!
Now, imagine not being able to process dairy properly and stumbling upon the item above in the grocery store. We bet you’d never feel as lucky for being lactose intolerant! Orange cream is good, and low-fat milk is also good, but both of them together? We’re not so sure about that!
A nice tasty fudge makes for the perfect snack. It is super easy to make it at home, and there is an infinite amount of variations to try with very little added work! Some variations are better left untouched, though!
“Bubblegum-flavored foods are actually good,” said no sane person ever! Just by looking at this fudge, we know it’s way too sweet. Maybe for a birthday party, but who would want kids high on sugar around for the whole day?
Depending on where you live, you’re probably well-accustomed to discussions about steak preparation and how to cook it perfectly. Perfect here depends solely on the person eating it. However, according to some men online, anything over medium rare is a waste of meat, apparently.
Well, we’re pretty sure this steak here is definitely not a waste of meat because it is basically uncooked! It literally looks like someone walked a cow through the kitchen and called it done. We know blue steak is a thing, but this is ridiculous!
Root beer milk
If you’re into ice cream and have no sense of right or wrong anymore, you would probably like all those flavored kinds of milk out there. This one here, for example. Apparently, it tastes just like a root beer float after it melts!
We wouldn’t know, of course, because the very thought of root beer-flavored milk is enough to turn our stomachs inside out. But if you have already lost all hope in life, give it a try! People say it is really good!
Fruity pebbles syrup
If you are an adult and you like to indulge your inner child every now and then by eating the most sugary breakfast cereal you can find, then this syrup is for you! Don’t just eat sugary cereals; eat sugary syrup as well!
At first glance, it may not look too appetizing with its bright red, danger-alert color, but some people swear by it! Others, probably people with a bit more common sense, say it’s just too sweet. So, maybe skip it if you don’t want diabetes.
Flamin’ hot mac & cheese
Just because two food items are popular doesn’t mean they have to be combined. If only people would learn this very simple lesson, articles like this one would be much rarer! This “Flamin’ Hot” Cheetos mac & cheese, for example!
First of all, what is that color? Mac & cheese is undeniably one of our favorite foods, and flamin’ hot Cheetos are tasty as well, but both combined? Come on, you know anyone who eats this will never leave the bathroom ever again!
La Croix is definitely one of the most polarizing beverages. For those who don’t know, La Croix is basically flavored sparkling water. If you are into sparkling water and weird flavors, you’ll probably like it. Otherwise, you better stay away.
Things get even worse if you throw in weird flavors like the one above. We have never tried it before, but a quick online search made us happy we made that choice. Apparently, it tastes foul, like nasty cola and coconuts. Ew.
We have never thought about it before, but for some reason, there is a big crossover between breakfast cereals and syrup brands out there. We think that’s mainly because they are both eaten at breakfast. This one here, though, doesn’t look that appetizing.
It is Cap’n Crunch artificially flavored maple syrup, after all. If the sickly blue color that looks like someone blended a smurf didn’t put you off, the label “artificially flavored maple syrup” will. It just sounds cloyingly sweet, almost revolting.
Sometimes, we get the urge to eat something, anything. But then, no matter how hard we try, we can never decide exactly what we want. If you also get like that sometimes, you’ll probably sympathize with the choices that were made below!
Or maybe not. After all, that’s a perfectly fine slice of cheese pizza that someone decided to dress up with half-melted chocolate pieces. Apparently, the chef couldn’t choose between dinner and dessert and decided to have both at the same time! Yuck!
At first, we didn’t know what we were looking at, but after a quick search that left us scarred for life, we finally realized these were nothing but starburst-flavored, jellied corn syrup. You heard that right – starburst-flavored, jellied corn syrup!
We have so many questions. Like, “how?” and “why?”. Honestly, why? We’re pretty sure that the only people interested in this product are sugar-addicted elves! Apparently, they’re all terrible, but the pink one is kind of okay. Try it if you’re brave enough!
Mac & cheese ice cream
Sometimes in your adult life, you get one of those days where you can’t be bothered to follow the ‘normal rules’ around eating habits. You’re all grown, so who says you can’t have ice cream before dinner? Better yet, why not have an ice cream that tastes just like dinner?
We’re pretty sure that was the reasoning behind the ice cream flavor above since there is no other reason for that to exist otherwise! We know that everybody loves mac & cheese and ice cream, but come on, this is not okay!
Winner, winner, turkey dinner
Ah, the transition from October to November! Who doesn’t love this delicious limbo between Halloween and Thanksgiving? We know we do! First, we stuff ourselves with all the candy we can get our hands on, then, we stuff our turkeys and pumpkin pies. Yummy!
This article is about culinary crimes, though, so forget about your cranberry sauce and red licorice! Or don’t; just mix them instead. That’s precisely what this company did with their turkey dinner-flavored candy corn! We’re definitely not thankful for that!
When you hear about tacos, you probably think of shredded meat, beans, cheese, and a whole world of spices, right? Most people do. Tacos can be eaten for dinner, lunch, or even breakfast if you’re brave enough! But what about dessert?
That was probably the thinking behind the tacos above. Instead of your traditional ingredients, you have banana pudding, wafers, and whipped cream! We’re aware that these dessert tacos are probably a crime against Mexicans, but we won’t lie – we’d eat them in a heartbeat!
Animal cracker moonshine
Who doesn’t love a good animal cracker? If you think about it, they’re the perfect snack for kids. Not only are they delicious, but they’re also fun to look at and trade around with friends. They even inspire kids to learn more about animals!
If you think that you can forget about them just because you’re an adult, you’re wrong. They can easily be made into moonshine to once again be enjoyed by you and your friends! Imagine just how sweet this drink must be, though. Barf!
Sweet and sour meatballs
If you have never thought words could disgust you, you probably haven’t stumbled upon an image like the one below. We’re pretty sure you would gag just by reading “Sweet and sour gushers meatballs,” let alone looking at the actual food!
If you don’t know what gusher candy is, it’s a type of gummy filled with sour fruity juice. Someone had the brilliant idea to inject this juice inside a perfectly normal meatball, and that’s how we ended up with the abomination here!
Sweet hot dog
You know when you take your kids to an amusement park and spend half of your time there just running around, trying to hit as many food vendors as possible to appease your hungry goblins? The next snack on our list has the perfect solution for you.
No, you’re not hallucinating. This is indeed a hot dog surrounded by cotton candy and covered with Nerds. Basically, a sweet dog, except the hot dog is your average, meaty one, not one made out of chocolate or something. Time-saving but disgusting.
We all know that person who has a thing for gourmet foods and drinks. Maybe they’re really into cheese, for example, or wine. Maybe even coffee! If you know someone like this in your circle, why not gift them the cheese below?
It will be even better if their thing is expensive cheese and/or coffee! According to some people, this coffee-flavored gouda cheese is actually delicious, but give it to your gourmet friend and see what they think. You can even record their reaction!
The everything bacon
If you’re the kind of person who loves eating at cafes and are into every single hip food out there, you’re probably very familiar with the everything bagel. Basically, an average bagel with a varied mix of toppings – from poppy seeds to garlic flakes!
This particular snack is so famous that it inspired the everything-bagel-flavored ice cream. Can you believe it? Now, there’s even an “everything bagel” with no bagel, as is the case here. Just a hunk of bacon with the toppings from the everything bagel!
If you want to get fit and are willing to try eating ‘better’ to achieve your goals, we have just the thing for you. Not only will it help with your eating habits, but it also contains ingredients that will make your skin smooth in the long run. Are you ready?
Chicken feet salad! We bet you weren’t expecting that! Even in the US, some people enjoy a good chicken foot, so why not put it in a salad? Maybe the little bones will be a bit of a problem, but as we said, it’s perfect for your new diet!
We don’t know about you, but we have a pretty clear idea of what a salad should be, and this one here ain’t it! If done right, ham salad is actually delicious. This one here, however, doesn’t look like it was made right.
It’s just… a pink paste. Like, is this minced ham? Sure. Maybe ham pâté? Probably. Ham salad, though? No way! Also, who knows how long it’s been sitting there. It looks more like dysentery in the making than actual food! No, thank you!
Mixed-flavor candy corn
To some people, the best thing about Halloween is decorating the house; for others, it is dressing up in their favorite costumes. Us? Well, we’re all about the candy, baby! If we could, we’d go trick-or-treating every year, even as adults!
This candy corn here is cursed, though, and not in a good, Halloween-y way! Not only is it mixed flavor candy corn, but the flavors are all crazy as well! Hot dog, hamburger, and popcorn? What? Why would anyone buy that?
Pineapple cottage cheese
It doesn’t matter how good your product is; if your marketing strategy is not good, you can bet no one will buy it. This applies to everything. You could be selling gold, but if the pictures on the package are bad, no one will want it!
That’s definitely the case here. Apparently, cottage cheese with pineapple has been around for ages, and not only does it taste good, but it is also great for your diet. But because of the bad picture on this package here, we’re all weirded out about it!
If you love a good peanut snack covered in chocolate, be prepared to gag with the product below! It horrifies us that someone would go to such lengths to ruin chocolate and chickpeas for us but oh well, what can we do?
In all honesty, it’s probably not that bad. After all, chickpeas don’t have a strong taste, so basically, you’ll be eating a crunchy chocolate ball, but still! It’s the thought that counts, and chickpeas covered with chocolate just sounds disgusting!
Slurpee snack pie
Snack pies are a great way to get over that pie craving that sometimes takes over us in the middle of the day. Most of the time, we can’t stop what we are doing to go bake a pie, so a snack pie it is!
The problem is they’ve become too popular, and as such, some weird flavors started pouring out of the factories, like piña colada and blue raspberry Slurpees. The blue raspberry one doesn’t even look edible if we’re being honest. Who would crave that?
If you’re really into carbonated drinks, especially sodas like Mountain Dew, then you’ll probably enjoy this terrible recipe. Then again, maybe not. Because no matter how ruined your taste buds are, this thing looks just as nasty as it probably tastes!
You didn’t read the text on the image above wrong; this is literally a Mountain Dew “cheesecake”! Not only that, but it has a Mountain Dew jelly topping, and its crust is made out of Doritos! No, just no. Who hurt you, my dude?
We understand that the world needs all the help it can get when it comes to the preservation and conservation of all its natural resources. But some things are just so absolutely bonkers we’re pretty sure Mother Nature herself would slap you if she could!
Where on earth did you get this idea of brewing coffee using your pasta water? More importantly, why are you having pasta for breakfast? If you really want to reduce wastage, use the water for soups and broths to cook regular food! Don’t be gross.
Some culinary crimes can be attributed to different factors, such as pregnancy cravings or alcohol consumption. These ones can be forgiven or, at least, overlooked. However, the person who thought this up and actually followed through with making it should just be punished.
You’re not looking at a roasted frog, by the way. The abomination above is actually scrambled eggs with Oreos! And not like, Oreos as a side dish, no! It’s literally eggs scrambled with Oreos in the mix. Are you happy with what you’ve done?
Gender reveal chocolate
By now, we can all agree that the internet has both a good and bad side. Sure, we can instantly talk to anyone no matter where they are in the world and find any information we want with just a few taps of our fingers, but is it really worth it?
Just look at internet fads all over social media sites, especially the controversial gender reveal parties. Not even our chocolate is safe from this dangerous madness, as you can see in the picture above! Was this necessary? Maybe we should have stuck to sending letters after all!
Pumpkin spice noodles
The first time we heard about this one, we were a bit curious. Pumpkin spice has no pumpkin in it, after all, just cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, and ginger! It doesn’t necessarily have to be sweet and can be used in many recipes. Like soups, for example!
We’ve never seen this anywhere, but some people online did, and we’re grateful we didn’t actually spend our money buying it. The general consensus is that this particular flavor tastes like a disgusting mix of air freshener, fake vanilla, and sour milk. Pass!
No, no one here is pregnant, but this lime cucumber Gatorade slushy doesn’t look that bad! It honestly seems super refreshing, like something you would drink by the side of the pool on a hot summer day. The only problem here, of course, is the dressing!
Why, oh, why would anyone put slices of cucumber inside their drinks? We’re aware that it hardly has any flavor, but still! The whole thing just doesn’t look right, and there’s no way anyone would convince us to take a sip. We can’t help but gag a little!
In this day and age, there’s no excuse for not knowing how to cook at least one dish properly. The internet is right there, after all, and it’s full of information that includes numerous recipes. We need to cut older generations some slack, though!
This woman’s mother-in-law, for example. She thought she was making guacamole but ended up with what looked like salsa or even pico de gallo. Where is the avocado, lady? Don’t get us wrong, it still looks reasonably good, but it definitely isn’t “gwaqumoli”!
If you think about it, the English language is a funny thing. For example, looking at the picture below, you will probably be repulsed to hell and back. But what’s written is not actually what’s being sold! “Cheese” here refers to the old meaning of the word.
That is, anything that’s been pressed in a mold. Also, very little liver is included here, and the fat is only there as protection. So, what you’re buying is basically bologna. Not so scary now, right? Still, it’s always a shock to stumble upon this at the store!
If you’re the kind of ‘purist’ who can’t conceive the idea of weird toppings on your pie, the kind who gags just by looking at dessert pizzas – and god forbid you ever see a pineapple in there! – then the image below will haunt you forever!
Yes, it’s worse than chocolate or pineapple pizza – it’s a kiwi pizza! And on top of what seems to be a perfectly fine cheese and shredded ham pie. Oh, the travesty! This one here should never be forgotten or forgiven, that’s for sure.
Rosé white cheddar
Everybody knows that you need to have some good cheese, crackers, and nuts if you want to have a proper wine tasting at home. But what if you could buy just one product instead of half of the grocery store? That sure would be nice!
That was probably the thinking behind this cheese here. Not only is it a white cheddar cheese, but it is also rosé-flavored and has almonds in it too! Now we will always think of this weird combination whenever we think of wine tasting.
Real cheddar cheesus
It’s almost impossible to turn down a good mac & cheese. If it comes with a side of good humor, we would feel even more tempted to just eat it all, no questions asked! It will give you constipation if you don’t like puns, though!
That’s because this is no regular mac & cheese, but “Cheesus,” a mac & cheese made in the image of Jesus himself. We don’t know what’s better – all the puns or the little Jesus faces made out of macaroni. What a blessed meal!
Corndog is the perfect snack if you’re running around a state fair or something similar and don’t want to get your hands all gross and sticky. They taste amazing and are very filling. Perfect for a day out with the kids!
If you try to make them at home, though, you’ll soon notice how much work you need to put into them. So, why not do what was done above? Sure, it doesn’t look as good and probably doesn’t taste good either, but it is still a corndog!
For some reason, people have developed a taste for gourmet chocolate these past few years. Apparently, no chocolate bar is good enough unless it is so dark and bitter you can barely move your facial muscles after a single bite!
We are pretty sure those people would love this chocolate here. It’s 70% dark chocolate with ginger and wasabi peas. Yuck! We aren’t really fans of dark chocolate, and this definitely affirms our choice. That’s a big no from us!
People have recently become super creative when it comes to snacks. Being inside a lot does that to humans, apparently. One of the things people enjoyed making was popcorn! Maybe that’s why we now have monstrosities like the ones below!
The problem here is not that this popcorn is organic; that’s actually good! But why does it have to have weird flavors like that? Call us purists, but the only acceptable popcorn is salted and buttered ones, like the ones at the movies! Anything else is sacrilege!
If you are Canadian, you should probably skip this one. Actually, no matter your nationality, you should skip this one. No, really, we mean it. It’s for your own good! If you choose to continue, don’t say we didn’t warn you.
What in the bland, undercooked madness is this poutine? We understand that frozen food is hardly the most appealing, but this is just too much! The poor fries, why are they so pale? The gravy and cheese also look like sewage! Eww!