Doctor Photograph’s Grocery Edits That Caused Us To Re-Evaluate All Of Our Go-To Brands
Have you ever felt the urge to bite into a KitKat without dividing the pieces, or maybe put mayo in your hot dog instead of ketchup? Are you…weird? If yes, this series of shocking photos are for you! A photoshop expert, Doctor Photograph, has been taking our favorite everyday items from the grocery store and transforming them in such a way that they spark a range of mixed but excited emotions in all of us! If you’ve been craving a new Oreo flavored chip bag or a can of tuna with a satirical twist in its tagline, Doctor Photograph’s Instagram account might be your best bet to live out your food fantasies. We can’t confirm (or deny) that these flavors and packaging will ever be available in stores. Still, from what we know, some brands may not be happy with the amount of creative liberty this editor has taken upon himself to make us see our favorite items in a whole new light!
Limited
We have cream of tartar, whipped cream, sour cream, and many more that exist to satisfy a desperate palette. But did you know what the most addictive cream flavor is? That’s right, nicotine. We’re lucky this doesn’t actually exist yet!
We all know that smoking kills and nicotine is addictive in general, but we can’t help but wonder what a combination of a cigarette and cream would taste like. Atrocious, we suppose. But if this were to pop up in stores, we know it will sell like hotcakes!
Oreo
This is kind of an unpopular and scary opinion to put out there now, but Oreo cookies are overrated as they are. There, we said it! If you don’t like the crispy biscuit and the white cream squished in the middle, chances are you won’t like this either.
If you ask us, boot leather sounds like it would be really chewy for no reason. Imagine dunking this into a cold glass of milk, and it still not become edible! As Oreo-haters, we can assure you we just hate the brand more. This here has nothing to do with them!
Mike
All of The Office fans, put your hands up because Prison Mike is in the house! Or in the office, or maybe in prison, but either way, he’s selling some good subs and deals! All he wants from you is to scare you!
If we had a sub in our stomachs, we would probably have the strength to not let go of our bar of soap in prison, which is another thing Prison Mike graciously warns us about. Whatever we do, if we see Prison Mike on a store sticker, we’re buying it.
Sponge
We don’t know a single person or child who doesn’t like SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidward, and Mr. Krab, who all live under the sea. In fact, if you’ve ever watched the show, chances are you’ve thought of Squidward as your cranky dad and the Krabby patty, something your mom gives to cheer you up.
So, of course, if we see a Krabby Patty logo and a Spongebob Squarepants doodle flower in the background on an item that is edible, you should best believe that we’re buying the whole stock! Get your kids and grab a snack!
Captain
Captain Crunch, Fruit Loops, Cinnamon Crunch, and pretty much every single bowl on a box of cereal ever sold always show sample visuals of the cereal floating in exploding out of an unrealistic bowl of milk. Just look at the background of the photo!
That milk never spills, spoils, or looks discolored. We can see why this might be frustrating and realistic, so we’re glad Doctor Photograph took matters into their own hands and showed us the correct item we should be buying instead; the milk.
Smell
Usually, people like the smell of vanilla, or coffee beans, and perhaps even wood, snow, or musk. But, this right here is for the moments when you miss those nights you spent at your favorite fast food place, having to beg the owner for the key to the bathroom.
You can probably buy that smell as an air freshener if we support Doctor Photograph enough. Maybe, if this picture gets enough exposure, the air freshener brands will wake up to the smell of the day, and it won’t always be freshly made coffee!
Claws
Almost everything becomes Christmassy if you add red, a Santa Claus image and a little bit peppermint flavored. We’re not the only ones who think that! Doctor Photograph sure knows what he’s doing. Imagine convincing fans this is a real Claws can!
We’re indeed convinced, and some of us even had to look this up to make sure it wasn’t legit. Well, we’re split. Some of us think peppermint Claws would taste great, but the other half isn’t at all enthusiastic about it. What about you?
October
The day the calendar states it’s the first of October, the world experiences a radical shift. All the white women start ordering their pumpkin spice lattes at Starbucks, and people change their clothes to match those earthy autumn tones.
So honestly, with everyone being so pumpkin spice-obsessed in the month of October, we’re genuinely surprised this ranch flavor isn’t a real thing already. But seriously, who wouldn’t like this? Some of us won’t…at all. But some things just aren’t for everyone!
Children
Some of you reading this probably have children, and if you don’t have a sense of humor, maybe skip this part of the list. But we can’t be the only ones who know for a fact that children will go through great lengths to put anything in their mouths as if it’s food.
If you see a snack labeled as ‘sand,’ you might cringe, but look at the adorable yet silly child on the logo? Yup, that child doesn’t give a darn and will happily eat sand or sand flavored things if it’s put in front of them on their high chair.
Jeez
This might be getting a little bit out of hand. Cheez-It’s that taste like either Clorox or Lysol? No thanks, we’ll pass! We know for a fact that some of you might be considering buying these, or worse, eating these, so we’re glad they don’t exist.
If you’re still wondering how to get a hold of them, then we have to ask: Sweetie, are you okay? Who hurt you? Please don’t eat, drink, or inhale any of this stuff. Get yourself some real Cheez-Its. You know, the NORMAL kind.
Wasabi
At first glance, we thought this was mayo and wasabi mixed, which, to be honest, we wouldn’t mind trying. It’ll be a hit or miss. But mayo and Monster?? We’ll keep walking right by this one. You’re more than welcome to try this, though.
It looks a little like Monster goo which might make you sick, but you have an open mind, right? You love mayo, and you’ve probably downed like six cans of Monster drinks that one wild night with your friends. Yup, go for it. We hope you have insurance.
Wendy’s
Spicy nuggets and vanilla frosty is all we need right now to put a smile on our faces, and we could just take it in whatever form it’s offered to us—yup, even as Cheez-It knock-offs. Unfortunately, as convenient as this seems, they’re not real!
Doctor Photograph’s photoshop skills really have us craving for things that don’t even exist! Would you eat these? They’re better than the disinfectant Cheez-Its, and if you were enthusiastic about those and not these, we’re not on the same page!
Kale
We don’t know about you, but we absolutely love puns, and if you haven’t spotted the one very cleverly fitted below in the picture, you HAVE to stop whatever is distracting you and stare at the beautiful burger below. Looks could kill.
Got it? Funny, right?! Kale is pretty okay to eat and is super healthy, and we’re ready to compromise a little on the junk if it means it’s healthier for us. This is for sure the burger of the week, and we can’t wait to bite in!
Tarts
As a fan of anything and everything spicy, we might look stupid enough to jump on the stage and try these out if these were ever actually launched by pop tarts. We want to take a moment to confirm that, nope, we won’t be trying this!
We like our stomachs the way they are right now and love the pop tarts in the form in which they’re currently sold! Sriracha sauce tastes best with perhaps anything else but pop tarts! This photo is this close to making us cry.
Again
Again with the blasted Cheez-Its and the cleaning category of flavors! Look, if you’re into mint and tasting fresh and flowery, there are other natural food items to eat other than Febreze snacks! But hey, who are we kidding. We love the smell… or taste… of fresh linen. We really don’t know anymore.
Just don’t eat your fresh laundry, please. Yes, we feel the need to issue this concerned warning because, in 2018, some of y’all actually ate Tide pods and miraculously lived to tell the tale. We won’t let this mistake happen again!
Shady
Meat thins actually sound exciting, and we would have jumped on this box to munch on it had it not been the line that states ‘100% edible’ right on top. That’s strange to everyone and not just us, right? Are other meat thins not 100% edible?
Since when did snacks become so complicated, and why does this photo edit seem so real! It took us a long, long time to spot the changes. Have you been able to spot them? Let us know! No, this isn’t a way to get the answers because we don’t know. Or is it…?
Grain
As rice lovers and frequent hoarders of rice, this may be the funniest photo edit in this list so far. The amount of detail in every line and image section of this edit by Doctor Photograph has us grinning from ear to ear.
It’s ‘surprisingly filling’ and ‘has a vitamin…probably’! The net weight is 2 grams, and the man on the box looks all too pleased with himself! Would we spend our money on this? Probably. We love rice, remember? And we gotta take what we can get!
Exes
If you’ve got a nasty ex in your life, this post might sting your heart a little like a sharp garlicky kick in your gut. But, if you love garlic bread, this might make you more upset than anything else. They’re defaming garlic bread because of horrible exes!
But the funniest detail on this box is the fact that the bottom right corner instructs users to keep the product frozen, effectively never opening it in case it brings the horrible ex back to your life. Fair enough!
2020
If this photo edit isn’t the most accurate thing ever, we don’t know what is. Sure, we’re in 2021 right now, but we think it’s safe to assume the same sentiment can be carried on into this year, too.
Covid and basically everything else just sucked the life out of these two years. Here’s hoping 2022 is better for everyone and Doctor Photograph doesn’t feel the need to photoshop this disgruntled message onto a seltzer can.
Shingles
We’re so glad the Instagram famous Doctor Photograph didn’t photoshop the actual Shingles disease photograph onto this can of Pringles! Sure, they’re real issues and can be super painful, but they’re definitely less appetizing than whatever material may be.
Did you notice how the Pringles man is wearing a construction safety hat? Too cute! If you love Pringles like we do, you’re now craving them and checking your pantry to see if you have any left. We hope you do!
Sub
‘Each can contains a 1-foot sub!’ is the biggest but also the hardest trace to notice that this is a photo edit or a scam. If this was being sold in a grocery store, we would have so many questions for so many different people.
But first things first; extra mayo?? Where! Where in that tiny can is there space for the entire foot-long sub and then some added mayo! What is this sorcery, huh? Man, how we wish this existed. It looks so pocket-friendly.
Wedding
Do you know what’s better than a wedding of any kind? The food served at the wedding, duh! When you get dressed up to wish the couple a happy married life, your heart is set on the amount of cake you’re going to eat.
So when a wedding is canceled, what do you think the to-be-wed couple does with all the food arrangements they made? Heart-breaking, for real. But, we hope all of them can be turned into emotional ice cream like this!
Ramsay
Chef Gordon Ramsay has a reputation that we don’t want to fight… at all. So, using this forced smiling photograph of his on a can of soup that also blurs out his potentially explicit words of anger in every sentence is HILARIOUS.
At this point, we have so many questions for Doctor Photograph. Do you think if we sent him a sappy fan text, he would reply to us? If you had the chance to talk to him, what would you say or ask?
Mold
Goldfish is one of the most popular snacks in America, and to see it moldy is just heartbreaking. But seeing it being marketed as Moldfish in a green sickening color makes us pukish. But, something also made us laugh out loud.
‘Xtra Germs’ in a Moldfish chips bag just can’t be taken seriously, especially in a world after COVID. But you know what, we’re split here because some of us strongly believe that people would buy and eat anything at all like tide pods in today’s world.
Pasta
There are some rules that are so strictly ingrained in our minds that it’s almost impossible to move away or change them in our minds. One of the strongest examples is the disgust in eating a bowl of pasta for breakfast.
Don’t get us wrong, pasta is one of our favorite foods, but with marshmallows, pop tarts, M&M’s, maple syrup, and fudge? No, thank you! This is a literal recipe for a mental and physical disaster. Here’s hoping this never makes it to the market!
Kevin
All The Office fans, this one is for you again! Kevin is one of our favorite characters, and the chili family recipe episode is one of his most iconic moments in the several seasons. He’s a gambling addict and a cutie for wanting to not waste time and saying fewer words than needed. This photo edit is super convincing!
We would buy this if it ever came true, but not for the recipe. Sure, we trust Kevin to make his best chili ever, but this can says it has extra carpet fiber, and you know what that means if you’ve seen the show. We’d rather buy to support him, you know?
Rick
Green ketchup just seems fake, and luckily, it is. This is ketchup blended with real pickles, but in this case, the pickles and the photo are fake, so PHEW. But if you’ve seen Rick and Morty, you know what this iconic Rick look means.
Honestly, we can’t get over the color of this ketchup because if they called it like a mint spread or something, we would believe them so quickly! It would be easy to fool us, and with photoshopping experts like Doctor Photograph, anything is possible.
Doritos
One of the main reasons Doritos gained popularity was because their flavors were amazing and diverse and also super colorful. But we can’t forget, an iconic and massively popular flavor in other chips is the plain and salted kind that is always a winner.
Obviously, Doctor Photograph had to take it one step further and remove everything, even the salt, but the corn base of the chips is still there. These are ‘Oops no flavor!’ flavored chips, and if that doesn’t make you cry, don’t worry. We’re crying on your behalf.
Lonely
The entire top left description of the product ideally captures exactly what the 40-year-old single man living in his parent’s basement life is like. Okay, if not that dire, then think Michael Scott on The Office sitcom will do.
Come on. This meal is made for him. But sadly, this is also true for too many of us. Life can be so lonely! We hope you don’t have to eat unseasoned turkey with stale stuffing. Learn how to cook hot and yummy meals for yourself!
Adderall
Drugs are harmful unless medically prescribed to patients by licensed and practicing doctors. However, this one photo edit is for everyone who gets a kick out of some dark humor and can laugh at their own depression as a coping mechanism.
This mint box has been quintessential in most of our childhoods, and seeing the progress we’ve made from not talking about mental health and drugs at all to Doctor Photograph incorporating these in their edits is fabulous to see.
Boomer
If you know an old white man who’s balding at the crown of his head, wears knee-length shorts and plays golf, you need to gift them this card if it ever makes its way to stores. The description probably works for them!
Doctor Photograph isn’t just mixing disgusting foods to come up with even worse combinations to catch our eyes, but definitely making a huge satirical statement with all these photo edits of gift cards of local diners. We’re hooting in support, pun intended.
Vicks
Every slightly melodramatic parent believes in the eternal power of Vicks VapoRub. If this ice cream stick ever got launched in the market with this exact collaboration, we definitely know exactly who the target market is going to be.
Do we blame them? Nope! We get it because if we were sick and absolutely had to have some medication, we would also like to have it in the ice cream form, wouldn’t you? Thank you, Doctor Photograph, for finally living up to your medical title!
Yuck
Okay, this one made us super squeamish, and we didn’t want to include it in the list. But if we had to experience this, so do you! Introducing, sadly, the mayoreo sauce. It might look like a McFlurry or a really well-blended smoothie. But it’s actually the complete opposite of that.
But remember, it’s mayo! Not ice cream! This one is on the list of things we hope we never have to see in stores. Doctor Photograph is out here getting a little too creative with their time, don’t you think?
QAnon
If you’re a fan of conspiracy theories, Reddit threads, and baseless accusations made against any and all random people across the globe, you‘re probably a fan of Qanon. It’s popular online on platforms like Twitter, but this photo edit shows them in a clown costume.
Remember, Halloween is ‘right’ around the corner, so grab your costumes asap before the actual clowns buy them! We don’t want a repeat of that horrid year of the clown threats, do we? Yup, we’d rather send the costumes to nerds.
Pizza
Look, if we ever see a tub full of ice cream that claims to taste like pizza rolls, you can feel free to punch us and bet us on our money because we’re definitely buying it, tasting it, and most likely get disappointed.
This might be one of the few fake items on this list that Doctor Photograph has managed to excite us by, and some of us are high-key hoping this lands in stores super soon. Pizza and ice cream in one tub! Are you kidding? Please!
Cheese Please
Honestly, even though we have said clearly that we think Oreos are overrated, we actually think this might work. People love cheese. And they love Oreos even more. Put them together, and we think that might be a million-dollar idea.
We’re not just talking about any regular cheese, either. We’re talking about nacho cheese which everybody, even kids, love. Even if this wasn’t a hit in the end, we are sure that people would be so curious about it, they would have to try it themselves.
Slim Jim + Ramen
Who remembers coming home after school and instantly eating Ramen? If it wasn’t Ramen, then maybe it was the meaty and salty Slim Jims. Listen, both flavors are extremely powerful. But we need someone like Doctor Photograph to put them together.
We might get some backlash for saying this, but we genuinely believe this would be delicious. We bet the Doctor did as well. Slim Jims basically taste like meat, so wouldn’t the combination of that with Raman be absolutely incredible. We think so!
Jones
If you’ve heard anything about the man featured on this bottle, we bet you it isn’t anything extraordinary. From his accent to his face, the man has gained fame for his conspiracies and again proved that he doesn’t give a darn about anyone but himself.
Just imagine our surprise when we saw him on a sticker of a relatively popular brand of soda and thought he was their new brand ambassador! How embarrassing! That’s the wonder of Doctor’s photograph skills, though. They look uncannily realistic.
Joanne
We have no idea who Joanne is. We only know Dolly Parton’s apparent rival, Jolene. Whatever the name is, a Sloppy Sauce on a Sandwich with fluffy bread sure looks like a treat to us. The fact that there’s a brand actually called Manwich though, freaks us out!
If we didn’t know any better, we would speculate that this post got taken seriously by fans of Manwich, who may have potentially shed their loyalty because the brand ‘supported women.’ Hey, you can’t blame us for thinking that there wouldn’t be some backlash if it were true!
Snack attack
This is honestly a snack that would give someone a heart attack. But also, this is usually a typical snack that is including in kid’s lunchboxes on a daily basis. This is not teaching them how to snack healthy or smart at all.
Also, can we just point out that this pudding is mixed with Baja Blast, which is only offered at Taco Bell and is one of the most popular drinks in the US. This snack also comes with a heart attack, which should definitely be included on the label.