40 Salty, Saucy, And Spicy Restaurant Clapbacks To Bad Customer Reviews
The food service industry is a modern miracle. When you’re sick, tired, lazy, or busy, you can order food to be delivered right to your doorstep. No food prep required. And restaurants are full of charm that some people can’t get enough of.
Since food is such a big part of our lives, many people make sure to leave reviews of places they love…and hate. After all, typing out a short message is an easy way to save a stranger from a bad meal. But potential customers aren’t the only ones reading those reviews. Managers and employees also have access to the internet. And when a bad review comes their way, deserved or unwarranted, you can be sure they’ll defend their honor with a clever clapback.
If you’d like to take a peek at these free comedy shows, look no further! Here are 40 times restaurant owners clapped back at bad customers.
Only in America
Nowadays, everything is dealt with through apps. Need a car ride? Download Uber. Want some food delivered? Use DoorDash. It’s simple, fast, and reliable…most of the time. Recently, employees have been complaining about the amount they’re paid, though. And you can clearly see why below…
Seven miles for a $3 burger? No way, especially if you consider the drivers are working for tips, but gas and car maintenance comes straight from their pockets. Sure, he could have chosen to use a less “colorful” language, but then he wouldn’t be here, would he?
That’s just, like, your opinion
It doesn’t really matter if we’re all part of the same species; we are all unique in our own way. We all experience the world differently and, as such, no matter how similar our experiences may be, we develop diverse opinions all the time.
It’s all about perspective. While both Emma and the owner agree that her food was late, what happened afterward is seemingly up for debate. She was mad about one thing and used that as an excuse to insult the restaurant. In the end, there was no winner in this argument!
A wendy day
When we read a bad review online, we can’t help but empathize with the customer. Perhaps because we’re more likely to be the customer than the owner. But sometimes, the proprietor brings in a different point of view, and we can understand the situation better. This little exchange here, though, made us agree with absolutely no one!
On one hand, you can’t really complain about pizza being left outside if you actually asked them to deliver it that way. On the other, you can’t serve pizza cold, even if it’s a windy day (we’re just guessing here). And telling your customer to cook their own food? Big no-no!
You don’t need to be a chef in a five-star restaurant to know when you get a dry burger. Just one bite tells you everything you need to know. It’s true that some people are picky eaters, but it’s also a fact that some chefs can’t cook a simple burger.
This little convo here seems to be an exchange between these two kinds of people, funnily enough. No tomato? That would be fine for most people, but not for this customer. A dry burger? No amount of mayo, ketchup, and sauce can ever change that.
No one enjoys cold food. It’s just unappetizing, and, in general, people don’t like having to use their microwaves to heat up dishes that were supposed to arrive hot. That said, accidents do happen during delivery. Like the one described below…
The delivery service owned up to the bad service the customer seemed to get, but that didn’t mean they were done with the affair. What’s worse, cold food or a stolen car? We think the latter. No wonder the reply was so sassy.
When it comes to cooking, there are a bunch of unwritten rules about ingredients, spices, and whatnot. Such as, when it’s best to put something in the pan, what reactions certain ingredients have with others; that kind of thing. Knowing that, we have never heard about fresh potatoes making things greasy.
Nonetheless, that’s exactly the excuse this restaurant owner used to justify his greasy fries and greasy food. We’re not professional cooks here, but we’re pretty sure that’s not accurate at all. Maybe the chef should be more attentive to his dishes. Just a thought.
Seen this before
For some reason, people love trying to get things for free, especially at restaurants and fast food places. Some go out of their way to make the employees’ lives miserable in order to get a free burger or milkshake. We’ve all seen this before.
Some people are so lazy, they don’t even bother to make a scene in person. Avery here, for example, left a bad review for her kebab order, but soon was exposed by the owner. Apparently, she has done this before in order to get free food. Shame on you!
There is a reason why bartenders won’t serve alcohol to people who are already intoxicated. First, it is highly illegal, and if they’re caught doing it, the consequences can be severe. Second, drunk people are way too annoying. Who wants to deal with that?
Not this bartender here, that’s for sure. This customer complained that they didn’t serve her friend any drinks on their night out, but what she forgot to mention was that her friend was already drunk! Hopefully, this was just an off night and she doesn’t really need AA.
Not yet open
The best thing about living in a big city is the amount of service available. What do you want for dinner? Sushi? Indian food? Something Chinese? Don’t worry; you can have whatever you want, and it won’t cost you an arm and a leg, either!
Some people get so excited about a new business opening around their neighborhood, they actually time travel just to be the first person to order from there. At least, that’s what this person did, apparently, since the place she just reviewed wasn’t even open yet!
Food waste is a serious problem in our world. Did you know we produce enough food to end world hunger, but most of it goes to waste because not everyone can afford to buy it? That’s true! So, that’s why we kind of understand the owner’s reaction below.
When faced with a bad review about his food, saying that it wasn’t fit for human consumption and it went right to the dog bowl, the owner was relieved that, at least, his food didn’t go to waste. If only more people were as positive as him.
Not on the menu
It doesn’t really matter what part of society we’re talking about; scammers are a plague everywhere! They’ll try to get your money through the phone, the computer, in person, or even on the online review section of your business, if you can believe it!
At first, this review doesn’t seem to be that bad; just your average bad feedback from a scornful customer, right? But when you read the owner’s reply, you can clearly see the intentions behind the customer’s complaint. No free stuff for you, scammer!
We’re all humans here — at least, we hope we are — so we should, theoretically, understand that mistakes happen all the time. Misunderstandings, too, happen left and right, and there’s no point in getting angry about it, unless you want an early grave!
Apparently, the owner here didn’t get the memo. After finishing a delivery, the driver drove away before collecting payment. The owner would have none of it and threatened the customer, but was kindly informed it was actually the driver’s fault! Just a simple misunderstanding, no need to get angry about it!
Biggest portions in Oxford
Kebabs are the perfect kind of street food, if you think about it. Not only are they super filling, but they’re also full of flavor! They’ve been around forever, too, and kebab shops can be found pretty much all over the world!
As such, competition is sky-high in this industry. To be a notable business, you need to serve the juiciest, biggest, most colorful foods. When a customer claimed the shop didn’t deliver as expected, the owner didn’t take long to refute his accusations.
It doesn’t happen all the time, but sometimes, someone’s accent is so thick you can actually “hear” it through text. Fortunately for all of us, it was easy enough to translate this guy’s accent and understand his dissatisfaction with his food.
That’s not the funny part, though. Accents are natural and beautiful and literally everyone in the world has one! What was actually funny was the restaurant owner’s answer. The chips weren’t just strangers; they were from a completely different world.
If you’re looking to have a laugh at some unreasonable customers unfairly complaining about their orders online, you’ve come to the right place. Sometimes, though, the customer is not the problem! Case in point: this restaurant owner and his answer below…
Sure, it’s easier to stumble upon an entitled customer or two while surfing the internet, but some restaurant owners deserve their bad reviews. At least, this one here does! Not only does he serve terrible food, but he’s also a terrible business owner.
People are always searching for the truth, even if they can’t really deal with it. No one likes being lied to or deceived in any kind of way. So why is it so hard for us to tell the truth or accept it when needed?
That’s a question we’ll leave for the psychologists and philosophers out there. All we need to know for now is that Megan here, apparently, is not telling the truth in her bad review! What is actually the truth? We don’t know! Oh, the mystery!
Happy new year?
There is a fine line between being funny and being plain rude. For this business owner here, this line is a four-lane highway! We understand the new year had just arrived, and sure, Bailey was lucky to find a place to get food from, but if you’re open, you’re open!
It is not the customer’s fault you decided to open your restaurant on New Years Eve! Do your job properly or close for the day. It’s simple as that! Besides, Bailey actually enjoyed her food despite it being cold, so maybe tone it down a little bit?
The missing Coca-Cola
Coca-Cola is one of the most famous sodas out there. It doesn’t matter where you’re from, you’ve probably had Coke at some point in your life. That very first sip of this icy-cold deliciousness is enough to get you hooked for life.
That’s why we kind of understand where this customer here is coming from on his bad review. We, too, would be angry if we ordered Coke, but it never arrived. The owner is not amused, though. Maybe he prefers Pepsi.
Getting a kebab for dinner is a great way to have a filling meal while not having to work at all. Just go and buy one or order one, and you’re set for the night! That’s exactly what this woman here did for her son. Unfortunately, things didn’t go as planned…
Her son got food poisoning from his kebab and ended up at the hospital! After learning about this, the owner was ridiculously rude and barred the family from his restaurant. We don’t know about you, but if we get food poisoning from somewhere, we won’t be coming back anyway.
There is nothing more disappointing than ordering food that’s supposed to arrive hot, only for it to show up at your doorstep barely thawed! What if you don’t have a microwave or enough time available to heat your food up? Unfortunately, that happens rather frequently.
Besides, even if you do have a microwave and all the time in the world to heat your food in it, you really shouldn’t have to! If it is supposed to be hot, it should arrive hot, and failure to do so should result in a bad review!
Very few things in life are as satisfying as catching someone lying to your face when you actually know the truth. Especially when you can throw the truth right at them. That “gotcha!” moment is truly beautiful and watching the liars crumbling is a meal in itself!
That’s why we think the owner here was feeling pretty proud of himself after catching this person shamelessly lying on their bad review. It’s all a matter of logic, really, and this person certainly didn’t think things through enough before posting it.
Leeches gonna leech
Working from home has become super popular ever since COVID-19 hit us. It is not only a safer way to still get things done, but it’s also more relaxing and less demanding since you don’t have to spend hours in traffic every day!
Some people prefer going to go to a different environment, though. If you also want to do that, make sure to talk to the owner of the place first! A chai latte and a ginger beer for over three hours of free electricity? It doesn’t seem fair!
To the point
We, as people, love talking all the time. It doesn’t even matter what we’re talking about; we’re just going to chat about anything non-stop and then find something else to go on about! That’s why we’re very glad to read the little exchange below.
It’s a bad review just like the others, except this one is super short. Both the customer and the restaurant owner go straight to the point, with no razzle-dazzle. Chips were disgusting? Don’t get them, then. Simple as that. You love to see it!
A way with words
One thing most of these bad reviews have in common is a lack of proper grammar. Sure, it is the internet and people can write however they want, but if we can’t understand you, we won’t take your opinion seriously. It’s simple as that.
That’s why we totally understand this owner’s reaction. A nicely written review, with actual punctuation and well-structured sentences? Yes, please! We’d also ask her to rewrite our menu for us if we were the owner of this place. What a masterpiece!
Well, that escalated quickly
Okay, we’ve got to admit — we’re not the biggest fans of rude comments, no matter if they come from the customers or the owner. This one here, though, had us laughing out loud. It’s so absurd and escalated so quickly that we simply couldn’t control ourselves.
Not enough of the cold food to fill your stomach is terrible, and the hair is just plain gross. The owner’s answer takes the cake, though. Was the hair to cover the bald-faced lie about cold food? Better watch out for that owner’s clapbacks.
No swearing allowed
We can all agree that, while swearing is rude, there are a couple of situations where swearing should be allowed. Like a busy kitchen, for example. There’s no better way for the chef to relieve some pressure than to drop some F-bombs around. We’re all looking at you, Ramsey!
Apparently, this restaurant here is really not that different from the others. At least, according to the customer who called to complain. The owner says swearing is not allowed there, though, but somehow, for some reason, we don’t believe him.
If you really enjoy eating food, then you know one of the best inventions in this world was the food delivery service. It doesn’t matter what or when you want to eat; with just a few clicks, it will be on its way to your house.
One thing all restaurants agree on is that you, the customer, need to make your part when it comes to the whole delivery thing. Put on the right address, describe your house correctly and, if you live in a dark street, turn on the outside light!
The vegan korma
Recently, we’ve been through a huge vegan wave. Some people decide to become vegans for medical or aesthetic reasons. Others, because they don’t agree with the rampant consumption of animal products. Either way, we now have plenty of options for people with different dietary needs!
Still, some folks simply don’t understand how veganism works, as we can see above. Everything was well and good until the mention of single cream…which has milk in it! At least the restaurant owner seems reasonable enough, and we’re sure they were able to come to an understanding!
Sometimes, we stumble upon complaints online so absurd we need to take a couple of minutes to process exactly what happened. That’s definitely the case here! At first, it seems like a pretty average bad review, but if you read the owner’s answer, you’ll realize there is something wrong.
Apparently, Melanie wasn’t new to leaving a review for this restaurant. Just like another reviewer, she loved the food. But something happened this time around that got her angry enough to damage property. Melanie, that’s not the food’s fault. You have some issues to work on…
Time and place, folks
If you deal with the public at work, then you know there is a time and place for everything. You can’t go around treating your customers like they’re your friends, for example. Be cordial, yes, but never casual. This is something the delivery driver below has never learned, apparently.
Not only does he shamelessly hit on the customer, which is a big no-no in itself, but he also does so by messaging her on her personal phone number — that he probably got on the food delivery app, for working-related subjects only! Yikes! Stalker much?
Sometimes, when you get home after a rough day in the office, you don’t really want to cook for yourself. If you can afford it, a nice takeout is your best bet for these particular days. If your order gets messed up, though, that’s enough to ruin your whole week!
That’s exactly what happened here. Cònor here ordered his food but got something completely different from what he wanted. On top of that, the restaurant he ordered from was not the cleanest around either. We, too, would be sad if that happened to us.
Two and a half stars
It is common sense that if you didn’t enjoy a service provided to you and you have the opportunity to review it online, you’re probably going to give them one star. This person here is obviously the exception to this rule, though.
Apparently, everything about her order was wrong — both the chicken and the gravy were super salty, the bread was soggy, and the fries were somehow completely hollow and unsalted. Definitely a one-star worthy service, right? According to her, not really.
It doesn’t matter what language you speak or where you’re from, if you’re talking with another human — even if you both speak the same language — you’re prone to miscommunication. It happens everywhere, all of the time, and can lead to pretty hilarious exchanges.
Like the one above, for example. The customer was complaining about the quality of his food, but the owner thought he was talking about the hygiene of the delivery process. In the end, we’re not quite sure they got to understand each other.
Being a restaurant owner or even just a chef is a big responsibility. Not only are you the face of your business, but you’re responsible for the health of all your customers! No one wants a crowd of people getting food poisoning after eating your food, after all.
That’s what this person here was worried about, probably, but once he saw that the customer actually wanted another kebab instead of the dirty one, he soon backtracked and went ballistic. We’ve all heard of the five-second rule, but this is ridiculous!
For some reason, feelings of rivalry can sprout literally anywhere. It doesn’t even have to be a competitive environment to nurture this kind of feeling between people. Maybe that’s just human nature; maybe people are going absolutely bonkers. Maybe it’s both things.
Here, we have a fast food place whose neighbor is a jewelry store. Nothing out of the ordinary, right? Well, except one of the jewelry store employees left a bad review on the fast food place! The catch? He has never even eaten there!
There is nothing worse than ordering a delicious meal only to find out, on your first bite, that it is absolutely bland. Especially if that food was something you were looking forward to all day. It’s enough to make a grown man cry!
Apparently, that’s exactly what happened here. The spicy burger was bland, as were the spicy chicken wings and the kebab meat, too. According to the owner, though, all of those items are very flavorful. The only logical conclusion? This person definitely has COVID-19!
If you go down the rabbit hole of bad online reviews for restaurants, you’ll soon notice a particularly weird trend. For some reason, people love giving random bad reviews to places that are not even open yet! What’s up with that?
There are only two possible explanations for that. They’re either confused time travelers or super lazy scammers trying to get free stuff, but not even bothering to check if the place is open to begin with! We’re pretty sure we know the answer to this one.
If you’re a rational person, then you know that while there is always the possibility of something bad happening, the probability of it actually occurring is very low. You’re more likely to die in a car accident on your way to the airport than in a plane crash, for example.
That doesn’t mean bad things don’t happen, though. This person here was unlucky enough to bite into a duck bone and ended up breaking a tooth. According to the restaurant owner, she should probably buy a lottery ticket. Who knows, maybe lightning does strike twice!
If you enjoy going to restaurants, then you know there is a whole “foodie” culture out there. People who go to restaurants not only to have dinner but to have different experiences both with their food and their surroundings. Many people even write blogs about it!
This customer here must be one of those people, but without the knowledge that this hobby requires. The pork and chicken gyros weren’t up to his taste, but maybe the problem wasn’t the food, after all. At least, that’s what the restaurant owner thinks.
Despite how the popular saying goes, the customers are not, in fact, always right. Just because you’re paying for a particular service, doesn’t mean you own the place and all of its employees. Apparently, the customer here didn’t understand that when she ordered her food.
A fifteen-minute delay on a delivery during a bank holiday? Sorry, but that’s nothing! And what’s up with going to bed when your food doesn’t arrive exactly on time — again, on a bank holiday? This is on you and you alone, Claire!